Every Thursday night I scour the web for the week’s best essays, articles, editorials, videos and podcasts that speak directly to the Sevenelles. From the hundreds of pieces I harvest, I weigh every one and bring you the finest five in each of the seven elements.
This week I harvested 167 candidate items from 56 sources and selected the 35 best for today’s menu.
Cream of the Crops
The finest find in each of the seven elements
Live
How to Stop Waiting and Start Living: A Jolt from Henry James
James built a whole novella around a man so busy bracing for his life that he skipped it, and the cruelty is how reasonable he sounds the entire time. The line that sticks: it wouldn’t have been failure to be bankrupt or hanged, ‘it was failure not to be anything.’ Read it before you put off one more thing.
Live • Learn • Leave • Frankscore: 88
🌱 Try this: Notice the next time you say ‘after this is over,’ and write down exactly what ‘this’ is.
Love
A housemate goes into labour upstairs, and Oldfield ends the day pouring bleach on bloodstained towels, thinking it didn’t even feel that full. She ran a think tank, found every policy problem led back to disconnection, then did the inconvenient thing about it. It’s a case against the dream home ‘with far, far fewer people in it,’ from someone who has binned a stray catheter.
Live • Love • Learn • Frankscore: 67
🌱 Try this: Count the people outside your home you could ask to borrow towels at 7am without apologizing first.
Learn
How to Unself in Order to Be Who You Really Are
Murdoch pictures herself at a window, brooding over some damage to her prestige, when a kestrel shows up and the hurt vanity simply evaporates: ‘There is nothing now but kestrel.’ The useful catch is that you can’t strong-arm it. Self-directed enjoyment of nature, she says, is forced, which rules out looking at birds while secretly grading yourself on your inner peace.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 70
🌱 Try this: Find one bird, stone or tree that has zero interest in you, and stare at it until your grievance gets bored.
Laugh
A novelist argues with her manuscript, which is sarcastic, uncooperative and asks whether it would kill her to throw in a little masturbation. Under the bit sits a partner’s mother with Alzheimer’s, a ‘crone’ necklace from Etsy, and the discovery that handing care to Memory Care is different but not a relief. The jokes don’t lighten any of that. They just make it readable.
Live • Love • Laugh • Labor • Frankscore: 60
🌱 Try this: Notice which part of your life you leave out of conversation for being ‘uncool,’ and tell one person about it.
Labor
Portraits of another life: Nemo Gould
As a kid, Gould discovered that most things are held together by screws, which is bad news for every GI Joe and household appliance within reach. He never got over it, and now discarded objects become machines that whirr into motion on their own. The argument is that much of the joy lives in the hands-on mess, not just the finished piece, a dangerous idea to show anyone with a deadline.
Live • Labor • Frankscore: 30
🌱 Try this: Take apart one broken thing you were about to throw out, just to see how it was held together.
Leave
Kenko wrote this some seven hundred years ago and already had our excuses catalogued: ‘Let’s just wait until after this is over,’ ‘While I’m at it I’ll just see to that.’ He asks whether anyone with a fire close behind him pauses before fleeing, and observes that reasonably intelligent people do exactly that for a lifetime. Brutal stuff for a book called idleness.
Live • Learn • Leave • Legacy • Frankscore: 80
🌱 Try this: Write down the step you keep deferring, and next to it the specific ‘after this’ you’re waiting on.
Legacy
After her mum died, the family tried Seville orange, apricot and plum, and the jars sat unfinished in the fridge for months because none of them tasted of any memories. Then came a cumquat tree in a yellow pot, a first batch overcooked to the wrong colour, six jars this year, and mother and son silently rationing the last one. Legacy, it turns out, needs four people and a trolley every move.
Love • Leave • Legacy • Frankscore: 60
🌱 Try this: Name one recipe that will die with someone you know, and ask them for it while asking is still possible.
🧵 Thread of the Week
‘Postpone Your Pleasures’ sounds like sound advice right up until you meet Henry James’s man in ‘How to Stop Waiting and Start Living: A Jolt from Henry James,’ who postponed so thoroughly that the waiting turned out to be his entire fate. Read them side by side and the line between savoring and stalling gets uncomfortably thin: ‘it was failure not to be anything.’
→ How to Stop Waiting and Start Living: A Jolt from Henry James · from the archive: Postpone Your Pleasures
🪱 The Compost Heap
Quad9 (DNS Resolver) to Exit France
Quad9 calls recursive DNS ‘a neutral and passive service,’ then promises never to alter your responses ‘in a way that opposes your expectations.’ That qualifier is a sentence only a resolver that alters responses would bother to write, and a resolver that bills itself as defending you against cyber threats was never all that passive. Leaving France over a fine cut to €1,000 a day may be the principled call, but then call it principle, not ‘technically unfeasible,’ which is a press release in a lab coat.
The Rest of the Best
Ranked by Frankscore
Love After Life: Nobel-Winning Physicist Richard Feynman’s Extraordinary Letter to His Departed Wife
The arch-rationalist Feynman wrote a love letter to his dead wife. His biographer’s heart stopped.
Love • Leave • Frankscore: 76
How to Grow Old without Letting Life Become a Parody of Itself
Old age can make life a parody of itself; the cure is passion strong enough to stop you turning inward.
Live • Learn • Leave • Frankscore: 73
How to Be Un-Dead: Notes on Waking Up from the Trance of Near-Living
Anaïs Nin in her twenties diagnosing the rest of us: pick a state, stay in it, and congratulations, you’re dead.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 63
Twelve years caregiving, 17 aunts and uncles gone, still unprepared. Mom gave funeral hair advice, though.
Love • Learn • Leave • Frankscore: 60
Drew Magary, 17 years of soccer chauffeuring, rain-soaked extra time, and the dawning horror that it’s ending.
Live • Love • Frankscore: 57
The Uncanny Catharsis of the AI Emomercial
AI ads where tears dangle like snot and a sister back from Seoul rescues you from the crime of aging.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 57
A boy in love with words (‘sesquipedalianism’!) writes mad letters to celebrities on his paranoid mother’s behalf.
Love • Legacy • Frankscore: 57
What life in Denmark shows about the power of emotional safety
Danes leave sleeping babies outside cafés and spend meetings discussing meetings. Somehow that’s the secret.
Live • Love • Learn • Frankscore: 54
40 days to arrive, 40 days to leave: How Armenian culture honors life’s most important moments
Armenians give newborns 40 days and the dead 40 days. One mother’s karasunk kept her from a friend’s rites.
Love • Learn • Leave • Frankscore: 54
Even gods can’t do spiritual practice; too distracted. Finally, a cosmology that explains my phone.
Live • Learn • Leave • Frankscore: 53
Won’t Someone Please Stop Me, Dr. Frankenstein, from Building the Creature?
Frankenstein frets about the Monster race and a reckless Swiss rival. An assistant quit over a head in a bucket.
Learn • Laugh • Frankscore: 51
Tarot for teachers: the Hermit eats broccoli from a mixing bowl watching The Pitt. Too accurate to be fortune.
Laugh • Labor • Frankscore: 51
The Man Who Taught Us How to Pay Attention
John Berger’s way of seeing pitched as the cure for infinite scrolling. Read it before you, well, scroll on.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 51
What a Fictional Robot Can Teach Us About Care
A mother who nearly named her baby Josie reads Klara and the Sun, a novel about a dying girl named Josie.
Love • Learn • Frankscore: 51
‘Barbara Forever’ Won’t Let You Forget
Barbara Hammer put her name in balloons so she wouldn’t get lost; this documentary is one more balloon.
Labor • Legacy • Frankscore: 51
Kalshi Updates the American Dream
One tip for the new American Dream: find the man in the top hat who actually decides for the groundhog.
Laugh • Labor • Frankscore: 51
Stop Trying to Be Your Best Self
An attachment expert caught herself performing well-adjustedness for her own therapist. Billable hours, wasted.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 51
A Patient’s Son Asked if His Father Died Peacefully. Was I Wrong to Lie?
A doctor weighs a kind lie against ‘I don’t know,’ the three hardest words at a deathbed.
Love • Leave • Frankscore: 51
Why romantic relationships matter more to men than to women
Bacon, Emerson and Kipling sold men the solo act; the research says men are the ones who need the duet.
Love • Learn • Frankscore: 51
Get More Selective, Even About Soup.
A man picks Costco soup over his wife’s, out loud, to her face, and turns it into a working theory of no.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 51
Ten hours of sitting in Korea, pain turned to emptiness, and stillness that leaves the moment you want more.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 45
The Man Who Taught Us How to Pay Attention
Berger in 1978, on photographs, foresaw the scroll: an eternal present where memory ceases to be necessary.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 45
Ask a Sober Oldster #39: Eric Zimmer
Homeless, jaundiced, 100 pounds, facing up to 50 years: Zimmer’s before picture makes the after hard to argue with.
Live • Learn • Frankscore: 45
What Dementia Taught Me About Living Through a Callous Time
Scream-singing Tom Petty through sundowners and giving up your ice cream: dementia care as a civic model.
Love • Frankscore: 45
A chandelier said to hold every bone in the human body, thanks to the plague, and a pilgrim who went to see it.
Leave • Frankscore: 45
Making of a Poem: Geoffrey G. O’Brien on “Ray of Light”
Joshua Clover said poems get worse after analysis; his friend talks about the elegy anyway, gently.
Love • Leave • Legacy • Frankscore: 42
What Do I Owe a Friend Whose Mental Illness Pulls Me Into Imagined Emergencies?
A rare ethics question with no villain, just a friend whose emergencies happen in a different reality.
Love • Frankscore: 42
How the Rabbit Revolution Went Too Far
Twenty-two speeds, safety locks and silencers: the rabbit vibrator went full spatula-that-dusts-the-floor.
Live • Learn • Laugh • Frankscore: 42
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